Friday, June 24, 2011

On Pre-Motherhood

When you have waited as long as I have to have children, even 16 diapers a day sounds like a reasonable way to spend your time. You cherish things like morning sickness because you just feel so lucky to experience it at all. You cherish every little step along the way, and think, if I only ever get to hear that heart beating and then it all goes awry, I will count myself immensely blessed. You look at those tiny faces and recognize something familiar. You promise yourself that any tragedy to follow will be worth these precious moments of watching tiny hands lifted to tiny faces and tiny legs kicking wildly inside of you. 

You count every step, every ache, every 30th trip to the bathroom a blessing because you don't know how it will all turn out, and you don't know if you will ever travel this road. You look at your swelling body and love it, you listen to your asthmatic breathing and embrace it. You are in awe that you get to even experience for a moment this wistful dream that so many take for granted. You choose it all, you embrace it, you cherish it. It isn't a burden; it's an honor. 


  1. Umm. Okay. So I've been sorely absent from blogging for a long time due to some personal strife, and I was SO excited to see this update. CONGRATS!!!!

    We really struggled to come across our first child, and we needed help with our second as well. I know what it's like to deeply cherish every blessed trip to the bathroom, and I'm glad you're cherishing every one, too. :)

    Enjoy! I'm so excited for your journey ahead!

    (I couldn't get my Google account to log in correctly, so I'm signing annonymously. But you know who I am. :) )


  2. Hi Kara,

    Thanks for your kind words. We are pretty excited too. I hope your personal strife settles into something worthwhile. Excited to see you back blogging!


  3. Hi, Recursively, I read your comment/announcement about your twins on Nat The Fat Rat, and I just couldn't stop myself from coming over to congratulate you! This is awesome!!! :-)

  4. Thanks so much for stopping by, Missy! It's one of those long-awaited rich blessings! They are only ultra-sound visible right now, but to me they are just as yummy as little Huck! :)

  5. Your hubby loves every beautiful inch of your swelling body! ;) Love you Babe!


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